Fugly-sexy

anarky · Post by **anarky** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 1:01 pm

I don't know what else to call this weird psychological phenomenon. I also know I'm not the only person to experience it.

Basically, someone of the opposite gender (or same, if that's your preference) who would ordinarily seem either quite plain or downright ugly to you, but there's something about them that makes you think, "If I had her, a hotel room, and a day to spend doing whatever kinky shit comes to mind, it'd be about a week too short" or maybe, "I'd fuck her until my dick fell off, then use my mouth and hands while the doctors reattached it so I could start immediately fucking her again once the stitches were in place."

So who are some of the ladies that you'd consider part of this, um, elite group?

Most guys I know put Christina Ricci near the top of this list. I'd have to agree. She looks like she's part cave troll, but damn she's hot!

I've heard of guys (and, more often, lesbians) who think this way of Chynna and Lucy Lawless, but, for me, they're just gross.

Uma Thurman definitely, when she's not looking too anorexic.

Let's see....

Something about Joan Osborne definitely puts her in this category, though I think that if you look her in the eye under normal circumstances, you might just turn to stone.

Weirdest one may be Janis Joplin circa 1969. Christ in a bucket, she was the ugliest woman to ever live. But, damn, I'd love to help her act out that classic line from "Move Over": You expect me to fuck like a goddamned mule! Yowzas.

I started this thread, and now I'm drawing a bit of a blank. So someone else's turn to add to the list.

Post by **vynsane** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 1:14 pm

yeah, x-tina ricci's definitely up there. i'd say lucy lawless is pretty doable, but definitely not "classically attractive".

both chicks from "american beauty" - thora birch and mena suvari are runners in this category. thora is like, this mousy little nothing, and mena looks like a fuckin' alien.

Ran · Post by **Ran** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 1:43 pm

Lucy Lawless...ok
Chyna (the wrestler)....no, especially after seeing her in Playboy. She'll sneeze and rip your dick off.
The blonde from American Beauty...yes
Joan "What if God was one of Us" Osborne...hell yeah.
Christina Ricci...sure, why not.

I can't think of her name, but lead singer from Garbage.

Post by **vynsane** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 1:50 pm

Rogue II wrote:I can't think of her name, but lead singer from Garbage.

shirley manson... i concur.

anarky · Post by **anarky** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 1:52 pm

Heh heh heh. I thought of both of them but didn't say anything because I didn't want to be accused of being a semi-pedosicko (especially with it being a known fact that I'm counting the days until Dell Rusk's costar turns 18 and praying she celebrates by doing a spread for Playboy). Many is the time when I've had to use rewind, slo-mo, and zoom on that one scene at the window.

indeed.

On the subject of "American" movies, Allyson Hannigan (sp?) looks like she's Franz Kafka's sister, and yet I could definitely sop her up with a biscuit.

I forgot to mention why my inclusion of Janis Joplin (prior to her choking to death on her own sick) seems so weird. Like I said, she is possibly the ugliest woman to ever live. But it's totally personality here. How ugly was she? In her CD boxed set, there's a picture of her wearing nothing but beads and a naive look. It's a picture that, if it were of any other woman (even Condoleeza Rice), would inspire raging hard-ons even in homosexual eunuchs, and convert women to lesbianism on the spot. Now, bearing in mind that I would do things to this woman that even the Grip and Grin wouldn't be able to think of if given a thousand years, every time I see that picture, I just shudder and think, "Eewwwwwww."

anarky · Post by **anarky** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 1:57 pm

I should mention that, since it seems disjointed, I started writing that immediately after reading vyn's first post.

Shirley Manson... oh hells yeah.

Post by **vynsane** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 2:02 pm

i don't know if i agree with allyson hannigan... she plays geeky mousy in the american pie movies, but her character on buffy and her photo shoot in FHM make her look feckin' HOT.

plus she looks like my ex-girlfriend from college... which brings with it some nostalgia.

anarky · Post by **anarky** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 2:08 pm

'Kay, I only know her from American Pie, and, well, if she's indeed a bona fide hottie, then she plays a weird-lookin' geek well enough to deserve an Oscar.

Post by **vynsane** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 2:14 pm

anarky wrote:'Kay, I only know her from American Pie, and, well, if she's indeed a bona fide hottie, then she plays a weird-lookin' geek well enough to deserve an Oscar.

oscar it is, then...

other hotness...

anarky · Post by **anarky** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 2:37 pm

Oh my God, vyn, I have never been happier to be proven wrong.

You are going to get me fired posting stuff like that, because it's very tough for me not to gawk at it.

Please note that I have filed the appropriate paperwork to remove Ms Hannigan from my "fugly-sexy" list, as well as moving her up several notches on my "chicks to stalk if my wife ever dumps me" list.

If I had less self-control, I'd be driving to her house right now so I could dig through her garbage.

Ran · Post by **Ran** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 3:02 pm

Holy crap! That's the Band chick from the American pie movies?

The Janis Joplin thing kind of bothers me because you know her bush had to be rather....natural.

Slicker · Post by **Slicker** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 3:21 pm

Allison Hannigan is soooo fucking hot!!

She's got some other pictures from Maxim that even trump the one posted here.

My list would look something like this:

Cunnilingus Rice
Britney (yes she's fugly in my book)
ummm...that's it.

Eternal Padawan · Post by **Eternal Padawan** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 3:32 pm

Allison Hannigan. AKA Mrs. Sly Wiley!!! Now you know why, fuckers.

This phenomenon you refer to is what I like to refer to as "Ice Skater Cute" Watching petite little ice skaters in "revealing" outfits zip around the ice at a distance makes them look really tasty. but then when you get to them up close you're all "ugh". This also applies to Gymnasts and swimmers.

anarky · Post by **anarky** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 3:35 pm

Eternal Padawan wrote:Allison Hannigan. AKA Mrs. Sly Wiley!!! Now you know why, fuckers.

Wow. That there is a major-league blast from the past.

Whatever happened to ol' Sly, anyway? Between dropping into our world and changing the timestream (I recall Mr T and Megatron chilling poolside for some reason), I kinda lost track of where it all went.

A-prospectin' I go.

Post by **vynsane** » Thu Nov 30, 2006 4:03 pm

Slicker wrote:Allison Hannigan is soooo fucking hot!!

She's got some other pictures from Maxim that even trump the one posted here.

hence the link "other hotness" below that pic... but i can understand if no one ever noticed it, or any other post in this topic below it. ever.