How I realized I was over Star Wars completely

[Senor JabbaJohnL]

Is the Force Unleashed game and the Clone Wars both about Anakin/Vader's apprentice?

Yes, but they're different apprentices (obviously . . . unless you didn't know that, in which case it's not obvious).

[anarky]

The main difference is Force Unleashed looks fun.

So, what did our one person here who's bothering think? (I don't remember who that might be. ) I saw two people elsewhere liked it, but they're not the two people I'd put the most stock in. Especially Mr. "I really loved Speed Racer, but then reviewed it and realized I didn't afterwards." (Fine if you hate a movie, but at least be consistent. Don't like it till it bombs and then conveniently change positions.)

[Ran]

So Vader apprentices are the new Clones? Make up a new one for every adventure. That is gay, oyes.

[vynsane]

actually, it would be awesome if she dies ever episode, kenny style.

"oh my god, they killed ahsoka! you BASTARDS!"

[anarky]

Y'know, it would actually be clever if the "Secret Apprentice" were Ahsoka. Have a well-planned downfall of the character to sort of mirror Vader's fall, only she winds up not making the final plunge to evil and Vader is forced to kill her himself. But, again, that would involve cleverness, something Lucasfilm is short on these days.

[Seven]

Did they do a midnight showing for this movie? Man, I totally forgot about it until I saw this thread.

[anarky]

Yeah, they did. And it sounds like crowds were underwhelming. What do you expect when you announce a movie at the last possible moment, and it's three episodes of an upcoming show, and then they don't communicate well that those episodes won't air, oh, and the movie gets overwhelmingly negative reviews, a lackluster response at Comic-Con, and looks to suck ass in ways no movie sequel has sucked ass since Highlander 2.

Oh, and check out this e-mail I got. Desperate?

Dear Star Wars Fan,

The best thing since Star Wars is finally here….The Clone Wars!!!

On August 15, a brand new Star Wars movie will be released!!! This first-ever animated feature from Lucasfilm Animation will sweep through the galaxy and movie theaters everywhere. In honor of this landmark event, we at Titan Publishing are offering a FREE issue of Star Wars Insider magazine to past subscribers (see details below.)

You will be on the cutting edge of all that is Star Wars, including The Clone Wars movie and subsequent animated television series. You will be part of exclusive interviews and in-depth articles. You will get the inside scoop on everything Jedi, Sith, and in between.
Take advantage of this exclusive offer now and be sure to be an insider on the groundbreaking fall release of The Force Unleashed…the new Star Wars video game!

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Simply click on the link below and you will receive 6 jam-packed issues for only $24.95! Subscribe in the next 10 days and we will send you a 7th issue FREE!
That's 45% off the newsstand price!

Once again, this is your FINAL NOTICE. This will be your last chance to receive this special offer.

Take advantage today.

May the Force be with you!

John Dziewiatkowski
Star Wars Insider

That fucking rag is $7.99? I dropped it when I was still a huge fanboy because it was astoundingly lame and not worth the price. Now it's the same price as Hyperspace, but separate?

Fuck that.

[Antropov]

I love the line "The best thing since Star Wars is finally here….The Clone Wars!!!". Its almost like they're admitting that's it pure shit that is simply flying the SW flag.

[Senor JabbaJohnL]

The main difference is Force Unleashed looks fun.

So, what did our one person here who's bothering think? (I don't remember who that might be. ) I saw two people elsewhere liked it, but they're not the two people I'd put the most stock in. Especially Mr. "I really loved Speed Racer, but then reviewed it and realized I didn't afterwards." (Fine if you hate a movie, but at least be consistent. Don't like it till it bombs and then conveniently change positions.)

I'm going later today. The extremely bad reviews are making me wonder, though . . . but there have been good ones as well, so I'll just see for myself in a few hours.

[anarky]

Ah. I figured you'd be there at midnight.

Definitely post your thoughts. Despite what you might think, I'd put a lot more stock in your review than 99% of the professionals (and guys who think they're professionals because they have a website), as well as almost anyone elsewhere.

[Steve Sansweet]

All this negative talk about the Clone Wars really tans my hyde! And you call yourselves fanboys! You will all pay for this outrage against the best movie since Revenge of the Sith!

[Senor JabbaJohnL]

Ah. I figured you'd be there at midnight.

Definitely post your thoughts. Despite what you might think, I'd put a lot more stock in your review than 99% of the professionals (and guys who think they're professionals because they have a website), as well as almost anyone elsewhere.

No, I've never been to a SW movie (or any movie, for that matter) at midnight. I have to wait until my family can go, which will definitely be sometime tonight but hopefully sooner than later. My dad and sister are currently coming home but traffic is apparently quite shitty since it's raining here and people go apeshit when that happens . . .

And thanks for the comment. I'll definitely talk about it later. I'm surprised more people elsewhere haven't yet.

[Diabolical]

As some of you may have may realized I'm kinda/sort of into mental self-torture, as I continue to read comics I don't really care for like Wolvergins and Punisher War Journal and voluntarily see underwhelming movies like The Incredible Hulk and Speed Racer.

Needless to say, I saw Clone Wars.

Is it bad? Yes.
As horrible as I imagined? Almost.
I now have a slight understanding of how the Prequel haters feel.

I didn't realize just how much I'd mist the 20th Century Fox fanfare. My hopes did improve ever so slightly when I saw the old familiar "A Long Time Ago In A Galaxy Far, Far Away..." and a modified version of the Star Wars logo (Clone Wars version) popped up on the screen and faded to the background, even though I knew there'd be no crawl.

The non droid or clone characters look really bad, maybe even worse than they do online. Lucasfilm claims they are supposed to be stylized and reminiscent of Thunderbirds-type characters. Horseshit. When almost everything almost looks like it came from the PT, these character stick out like a sore thumb. They look like unfinished animatics. And the lip-syncing for the characters is so far off. The mouths move as the character talks, but it doesn't match up very well.

People are making far too big a deal out of Jabba's uncle Ziro. Yeah, he's lame as hell, I'm not denying that. What they should have done was call him Capotta The Hutt (since his voice is pretty much Truman Copote (Hell, I even wondered if Phillip Seymour Hoffman did the voice!). At least that would have been a sort of in joke for the adults. I could almost hear the kids in the audience wondering why are they calling her his uncle?

For me, easily the most annoying character (even moreso than Ziro) was Ashoka. I wanted to punch that dumb little bitch in face. Unless some serious changes are made to her personality early in the series I think she will become fairly well hated. And Anakin is far too easily convinced to accept her as his padawan.

It comes as no surprise, but the timeline/continuity still doesn't make any damn sense. In the opening of the movie it is implied that this is very early on the Clone Wars, yet Anakin is no longer Obi-Wan's padawan and he has the scar over his eye (courtesy of Ventress). Anakin says Ashoka (ages 14 or 15) is too young to be a padawan a few times, which contradicts previously established continuity where (IIRC) a youngling must be chosen as a padawan by the age of 13 or he/she is cast out to the agricultural corps (damn, that sounds even dumber that I remember).

Jabba's son was pretty fucking lame also.

Sam Jackson and Anthony Daniels are totally wasted here, with only a few scenes each.
Anakin didn't really sound much like Anakin.

So what is good about Clone Wars?

Although a wasted opportunity, Sam Jackson is in it, and he makes everything a little better.
Obi-Wan's voice sounded pretty good, as did Yoda and Padme.
Most (but not all) of the action is actually pretty good.
Natalie Portman still looks hot, even as an toon.






One more thing: the Deuce makes a cameo.
Oyes.

[Senor JabbaJohnL]

My review from elsewhere:

I saw it tonight as well. While it's not on the same level of the films (by any means), I still liked it quite a bit and had fun.

Let's see, bad before good:

*Ahsoka is pretty damn annoying. So is Anakin when he interacts with her. It seems like he calls her "Snips" every time he addresses her, for no reason. I don't really hate her, but she did get on my nerves, constantly trying and mostly failing to be a smartass (to Rotta, after falling down battling Magnaguards on Tatooine: "I thought you liked playing in the sand."). She always has to give nicknames to everything (destroyer droids are "rolling death balls," R2-D2 is "Artooie"). She's not an absolutely terrible character, but I could definitely do without her.
*I really hate the battle droid humor. In TPM, there were a few funny moments, especially with the one trying to arrest Qui-Gon, but I mostly remember them for their awesome "unloading" sequence from the MTT. In AOTC, they were kind of jokey, and ROTS pushed that further with the stupid cutesy voices. In Clone Wars, I honestly think they are mentally retarded. The worst part: when Anakin or Ahsoka tells them they are outnumbered, a droid starts counting to check. Another bad one is a droid calling Ventress "Sir," then correcting himself in an obvious way. Some of their jokes could have been funny if they weren't done so poorly.
*The middle seems to drag on quite a bit. There's a lot of dialogue (which isn't done all that well), some repetition as far as battles go and Dooku constantly visiting Jabba, and a lot of nothing going on.
*There are way too many extreme close-ups on the characters' faces. It was too much.

Now, to the good:
*I absolutely loved the beginning. Was it different? Yeah, but get over it. I loved the "newsreel"-style opening and narration and seeing the various ships and Jedi, if only briefly. It got you right into the action and also let you know that this wasn't the normal Star Wars.
*The battle scenes were, for the most part, really sweet. I still love the part on Teth when Anakin jumps from STAP to STAP, and the Christophsis stuff was great too.
*The animation was pretty great. I really like the character designs (Dooku's beard looked like it had been painted on). The main characters sort of looked like Woody from Toy Story, or other kinds of dolls/marionettes, which was supposedly what they were going for (with the budget restrictions factoring, of course). I think it works for the most part. I really love their eyes. The non-human(oid) stuff was just beautiful, though.
*Yularen was a badass, and had a fairly sizeable role toward the beginning. Rex was a pretty cool addition as well.
*Call me crazy, but I loved the scenes in Ziro's lair. That dude was weird as hell, and I liked the seedy atmosphere of his place. And yeah, Padmé was . . . er . . . well-designed.
*I like the reasoning behing giving Anakin a Padawan was to have him learn about letting go of attachments, but obviously by the end of the war he never figured that one out.
*The voices on most of the characters were really good - Obi-Wan, Yoda, Padmé, Jabba, and Ventress standing out (along with the three "real" actors). Anakin was okay but tended to overact a little, same with Ahsoka, and it looked weird with their underemoting faces.

Overall, I really enjoyed it, and there were some problems (Ahsoka's personality, the battle droids being the main two) but I still think it's much better than the critics are saying. Chux, I'm not sure if you would like it, especially since you've not seen anything that you've liked so far (but feel free to ask questions about anything). My sister didn't like it (due to Ahsoka) but my parents did. As I said, it's not as good as the "real" movies, but it's fun and you could do worse as far as movies go.

However, I am now looking forward to the series even more than I was before. It will be nice to kind of get away from the Anakin/Obi-Wan/Ahsoka stuff for the most part. I want me some more Grievous and Kit Fisto.

Also, the Deuce has more screentime and lines than any of the other films, so that's got to count for something.

[Diabolical]

As I said elsewhere: I forgot about the stupid fucking nickname thing.
Snips? Artooie? Sky Guy?


And the battle droids weren't even remotely funny.