G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

[Diabolical]

After seeing this I think it is pretty clear that I MUST see GI Joe.
It will be a train wreck of epic proportions and I want a front row seat.

And in case you were wondering, "The Doctor" is Cobra Commander.

[anarky]

Okay, there is officially no saving this movie now.

I'm hoping Larry Hama's thoughts on appearing in it were, "Fuck, Hasbro won't pay me royalties for making up all these characters? Screw 'em; I'll be in the pile of shit and get residuals that way!"

[Ran]

That can't possibly be real unless it is from the makers of the Turkish Star Wars.

[anarky]

I'm embedding the image, since it looks like Hasbro is systematically going through sites and telling them to remove them. Which, unfortunately, confirms they're real. I seriously doubt they'd check the dirtiest rest stop on the information superhighway, so this way we can keep bitching about them.

[mabudon]

could it be I was right???

[vynsane]

i like "zartan's" "i have to poop" expression.

[anarky]

Oh God. I'm going to be sick.

DB, I'm afraid "train wreck of epic proportions" is likely to be the understatement of the entire millennium.

I think they're trying to make Transformers look good, and I think they're going to succeed.

[Double_G]

Ha. Suddenly "Transformers" doesn't seem so bad, does it? "G.I. Joe" looks god-awful.

[Ran]

That wasn't Transformers?

When the words "From the director of The Mummy" flashed up on the screen, it understood why this would be a shitfest.

Aside from that, The Baroness is hot.

[Diabolical]

DB, I'm afraid "train wreck of epic proportions" is likely to be the understatement of the entire millennium.

I think the train wreck comment should now apply to the trailer.

The Baroness is hot.

Oh hells yeah.

[mabudon]

Wow, I don't know why it took you all so long- granted my taste in movies is erratic and juvenile at best, but I could see the stink lines rising from this project when the first details came out

[vynsane]

Wow, I don't know why it took you all so long

hope. endless hope.

now dashed upon the rocks of... i dunno, the shore of the ocean of shittiness?

[anarky]

What took us so long? Like vyn said, hope. And the knowledge that this actually had a strong story to build on, and everyone seemed to at least acknowledge that the story they were apparently shitting on was strong.

At Comic-Con, my hopes were lifted at the panel, until someone asked, "Why Heavy Duty and not Roadblock," and the writer, who claimed to be familiar with GIJoe, said, "It wasn't a matter of the name. It was that the character of Heavy Duty resonated more." That's the easiest way to prove you're not a fan, claim some early 90s surrogate character "resonates" more than one of the icons, despite this character never actually doing anything.

[Diabolical]

now dashed upon the rocks of... i dunno, the shore of the ocean of shittiness?

Jersey?

[jdr3]

now dashed upon the rocks of... i dunno, the shore of the ocean of shittiness?

Jersey?

Dude, raggin' on Jersey?! Even Jersey shouldn't be closely associated with the turd that will be this movie.

If the movie had no association to G.I. Joe it probably wouldn't be horrible, but the fact that they are trampling on an iconic story just ruins it all.